Good News About the Holidays

Peace at Home November 11, 2021 | Ruth Freeman

by Ruth Freeman, LCSW

  • Do you get stressed about the holidays? 
  • Are you the holiday wizard who tries to make it magical for all? 
  • Wish the whole thing was already over?!? 

We’ve got good news for you about the holidays. 

Families who celebrate special occasions are more likely to raise kids who have a strong sense of identity, are physically healthy, succeed in school and have close ties to their families. So don’t think that these family celebrations are irrelevant. The more meaningful older teenagers think their family rituals are, the more likely they are to have a strong sense of themselves and even be able to handle the stress of going to college in freshman year. These special occasions help give kids a solid foundation and a feeling of being safe and secure in the world. So make sure those Scrooges in your life get the message. Another bit of very good news is that families who share preparations for holidays are more likely to continue those traditions. That means ideally no one person is running the show or doing all the work. (I think I hear a lot of big sighs of relief out there.) 

So what makes the holidays meaningful? Don’t be confused – you, your family and friends are the most important part of your child’s holiday experiences. The people they love are what they want most, really. So manage expectations so you can be really “present” – relaxed, focusing fully on your time together with joy. Don’t expect your holiday to look like a TV show or a Hallmark movie. Those are make-believe. The time it takes you to make all those fabulous creations is time taken away from your family. How it feels during the holidays is much more important than how it looks. 

Plan ahead and make lists together:

  • Think about what you want the season to be like and ask the kids about what makes the holidays enjoyable for them. Really listen, you might be surprised. Invite them to list all the activities they like. Talk about the activities that you like. Then as a family make a calendar of the activities that you can all agree on. Invite the kids to decorate the calendar and talk about them with enthusiasm as they are coming up. 
  • Then invite the kids to make a list of what they really want as gifts. Ask about each gift – what do they think they’ll like about it. Be curious and interested. Once that list is complete, be done with it. 
  • Invite the kids to think about what they want to give other people that can’t be bought. Think together about things that they can make or gift certificates for services they will provide to people like mowing lawns or making them a meal or just spending time together. In our family, a child might get to be the parent for the day or someone might offer to do someone else’s chores for a week.

Consider declaring a positive intention to handle holidays stress – take regular breaks, give up the holiday wizard role, notice perfectionism and expect intense emotions including grief. This is a time of year when we remember loved ones who are no longer with us or reflect on dreams that were lost or simply have to face some predictable family issues. Reach out for support and stay true to the plans that your family has created. Keep it simple, celebrate the little moments with your kids and remember to have fun!

For more parenting support, join us for an Upcoming Live Workshop, browse our Libraries of Quick Video Solutions and check out our podcasts and other resources.  Questions? Email us at Solutions@Peaceathomeparenting.com or learn more about our Corporate, School and NonProfit programs.

TOPICS

Related Posts

Peace at Home

Back‑to‑School Parenting Tips: How to Support Your Child’s

Why Back‑to‑School Emotions Often Trigger Parent Concerns The heightened emotions of the back-to-school season can feel exciting and

Peace at HomeJuly 28 , 2025
Peace at Home

How to Stop Overparenting: Raise Independent Kids by

This month at Peace At Home Parenting, we focused on something many families are struggling with: how to

Peace at HomeJuly 20 , 2025
Peace at Home

Parenting Perfectionism: How Comparison Is Stealing Your Joy

Let’s be honest—have you ever scrolled through social media, seen another family’s smiling vacation photo, color-coded snack drawers,

Peace at HomeJuly 13 , 2025
Peace at Home

The Parenting Paradox: Doing Less is the Secret

No prizes for guessing why “independence” is our theme this month. But here’s the real reason: more and

Peace at HomeJuly 03 , 2025
Peace at Home

Pride for Parents: Being an Ally Starts at

The world might feel especially heavy right now and for some of us, it’s always like that. If

Peace at HomeJune 23 , 2025
Peace at Home

Be the Anchor Your Child Needs in a

Parenting Through Chaos: Why You (and Your Child) Need a Steady Anchor Ever catch yourself thinking, “Once things

Peace at HomeJune 01 , 2025

Join our mailing lists for more parenting tips