October 2025 | Ruth Freeman, Aaron Weintraub
Ah, the holidays. We all have that picture-perfect image in our minds, don’t we? Twinkling lights, cozy evenings, and perfectly happy kids. But if you’re like most parents, the reality often feels more like a whirlwind of to-do lists, financial worries, and routines that have completely flown out the window.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the doing that we forget what we really want: to simply enjoy this time and connect with our kids.
The good news? It doesn’t have to be this complicated. You can absolutely find more joy and less stress. It just takes a little intention. Let’s walk through seven holiday parenting strategies to protect your peace and make those meaningful memories you’re craving.
The pressure to buy all the things is real. And when our kids start rattling off long lists, it’s easy to get stressed. But deep down, what kids will cherish years from now isn’t the most expensive toy. It’s the laughter, the silly new traditions, and the feeling of connection. They’ll remember you.
Try the 4-Gift Rule:
Finding balance in the marketing whirlwind can be tricky, and we’ll talk more about this in our November Lunch & Learn, on 11/19/2025 at 12:00 PM ET: Meaningful Holidays without the Pressure.
Who does all the holiday magic? The planning, the shopping, the wrapping, the cooking, the decorating… it’s a ton of invisible work, and it often falls on one person. But you can’t be a calm, confident guide for your kids if your own cup is empty.
Your kids don’t need a “perfect” holiday. They need a present, reasonably calm parent. Let go of perfection. Divide the holiday tasks—even if others don’t do them “your” way. The goal is a shared, happy-enough holiday, not a flawless event run by one exhausted ringmaster.
We cover this in depth in our recorded sessions:
Think about it: even adults get grumpy when overtired and over-sugared. Now imagine being a child. Late nights, endless treats, and no quiet time are a recipe for meltdowns.
A child who melts down over a broken cookie isn’t ungrateful; they’re overwhelmed. Their behavior is a signal. You don’t have to be a drill sergeant about routines, but try to protect sleep as much as possible. Plan for “no-event days” when everyone can just stay home and recharge. Keep healthy snacks on hand. These small bits of predictability are a lifeline for kids (and adults!) in a chaotic time.
With all the excitement and anticipation, the holidays are prime time for big feelings. Kids get overstimulated. They get disappointed. They get overwhelmed.
Our job isn’t to stop the feelings—it’s to be the calm harbor for them. When the meltdown happens (and it will!), get down on their level and acknowledge the feeling first:
All feelings are welcome—but not all behaviors. You can hold both at once: “It’s okay to be mad, but it’s not okay to hit. I’m going to keep us all safe.”
Later, when everyone is calm, circle back and reconnect. A simple family calendar, posted where everyone can see it, can also help kids know what to expect—and even help plan fun, connection-focused activities.
Family gatherings can be wonderful…and they can be complicated. If you’ll be around a relative who pushes boundaries or criticizes your parenting, have a plan with your partner.
Agree on how long you’ll stay. Create a signal (like a hand squeeze) that means “I’m hitting my limit” or “please step in.” A united, confident front supports both you and your child. It’s okay to keep visits short and prioritize time with people who make your family feel good.
For many, the holidays bring up grief or loss. If that’s you, please be gentle with yourself. It’s okay for this season to hold sadness.
Talk openly (in age-appropriate ways) with your kids about your feelings. It’s okay to say, “I’m feeling a little sad today because I miss Grandma. I’m thinking about that time we all baked cookies.” That models healthy coping and shows all feelings are part of life.
Scrolling through perfect holiday feeds on social media? Fast track to feeling like you’re not doing enough. But you are.
Put the phone down. The real magic isn’t in matching pajamas or the perfect tablescape. It’s in the small, in-between moments: the smell of cinnamon, the giggles over a bedtime story, the quiet glance that says, “This is what matters.”
Want help letting go of comparison? Check out:
The best holidays aren’t about perfection; they’re about presence. Your kids don’t need a flawless celebration. They need you. By setting boundaries, sharing the load, and focusing on small moments of connection, you can trade the stress for what really matters.
Wishing you and your family a holiday season that feels as good as it looks. We’re so grateful to be on this journey with you.
Questions? Email us at solutions@peaceathomeparenting.com
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