Peace at Home Blog

Help Your Child Make Friends: When to Lean In vs. Let Go

August 3, 2025 | Aaron Weintraub

Watching Kids Struggle is Heartbreaking

Watching your child struggle with friendships can be painful—even heartbreaking. At the start of the school year, when everything feels new and stress levels run high, many parents wonder: How can I help my child make friends without overstepping?

Maybe they’re being left out of playdates. Perhaps they struggle to make friends at school. Maybe they got put in a class without their friends. (This happened to my kiddo in 4th grade AND she got the mean teacher – the whole year was a struggle). Or maybe they are simply shy and can’t seem to connect the way other kids do. Whatever the case, it’s hard to know when to step in—and when to step back. 

And, it’s worth saying this again – it’s painful.

Recognize Your Own Feelings First

Not only are you watching your kid feel sad and hurt, it may bring up memories of when you felt left out. Add that all together and you have a storm of big feelings (the technical term is empathic resonance).  So it’s natural – you want to make these feelings go away as soon as possible. But what is the best approach? If you’re feeling unsure or second guessing how you handled it in the past –  you’re not alone. 

Be Patient

Many parents tend to offer advice, coach their every move, reach out to other parents and lie awake worrying about how to fix it. But real friendship skills come from something deeper—and they’re best developed over time, with care, support, and a lot of patience. It isn’t easy and it isn’t quick but we’ve got your back. 

Stay Calm and Present for Your Child

Take a moment, breathe deeply, and deploy a little self-compassion. Say to yourself, “This is hard, and I do remember those feelings of rejection or loneliness – and it sucked. But that was then.” It may help you separate those mixed-up emotions so that you can be present for your kid here and now. And if nothing else: take a beat and breathe.

Workshop: Help Your Child Make Friends — When to Lean In and When to Let Go

In our new workshop, Help Your Child Make Friends—When to Lean In and When to Let Go,  led by Peace at Home expert Aaron Weintraub MS, we explore how you can support your child’s social development without taking over. This session is a warm, practical guide for any parent who wants to help their child build lasting friendships—and confidence, too.

This workshop will strengthen your ability to nurture:

• Self-awareness and self-acceptance that help kids feel comfortable in their own skin
• Empathy and resilience, so your child can navigate peer dynamics with compassion and strength
• Confidence to connect, even in tricky or unfamiliar social settings

What You’ll Take Away –

This isn’t about teaching your child to be “popular.” It’s about helping them form meaningful relationships that grow from authenticity—not pressure.

After the workshop, you’ll be able to:

• Recognize what really fuels meaningful peer relationships—and what gets in the way
• Support your child through the ups and downs of friendships at different ages
• Support your child’s self-confidence in social settings
• Recognize when to let kids work things out and when it’s time for a parent to step in
• Help your child develop resilience and a strong sense of belonging—even when peer relationships are tough.
  

Why This Matters—for You and Your Child

For your child, this workshop can be a game-changer. You’ll be supporting not just their social skills, but their ability to cope, adapt, and feel a sense of belonging—even when friendships are challenging.

For you, it’s about peace of mind. Instead of second-guessing, you’ll walk away with clarity, confidence, and a toolkit for supporting your child with empathy and calm. Watch or Listen now!

For additional support, check out the School Age Kids and Peace at Home Starts Here Resource Guides with quick videos, handouts, recorded workshops, podcasts, and more.  Check out this recorded workshop: Be Your Child’s Emotions Coach.

Looking for more?

• Search for what you need
• Explore our Resource Guides, with quick videos and other resources, for every age and stage
• Check our calendar for live events

Questions? Email us at solutions@peaceathomeparenting.com

And now for the shameless plug…
Don’t have a Peace at Home Parenting Portal? Let’s fix that. Ask your company, school, or favorite neighborhood group to join us. We’ve got Corporate, K-12 School, and Family Service programs that bring calm to the chaos—no yoga mat required. Click here to join as an individual or family.