Peace at Home Blog

What do you do when you’re child comes home after graduating college? 

November 14, 2017 | Ruth Freeman

My daughter has a full time job, but because of loans can’t afford to move out of our home.  It’s so hard not to make comments on what she’s spending money on and her decisions.  Any advise? Hopefully you got some ideas about how to structure your agreements with your child about finances. I believe that adult children should make a contribution to room and board while living at home and that you develop the contract we mentioned during the class. However, once you have a financial agreement, I would refrain from comment unless she gives you permission to express your point of view. You could certainly offer to help her develop a budget or saving and spending plan to assist her with reaching her goals. And it is important that you recognize it is she who has to come up with those goals. I think we mentioned in our conversation that it is important to plan a time frame for your child living at home if that is important to you. But just commenting on her spending will likely not be productive nor help her improve her finances… and those comments could easily lead to conflict or distance between you.

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